Push-over Benji

Sag Harbor is drawing to a close and I've been asking myself whether Benji has undergone that magical transformation he was seeking at the beginning of the summer. He essentially wanted to go from "Benji" to "Ben," and come back to school being a little more cool. I thought that the episode with Melanie revealed Ben for just how young and uncertain he has remained.

First of all, Benji responds quickly to her attention even though he knows his friend is in a relationship with her, and he didn't initially have any interest in her. He really seems quite impressionable here, letting her steer the course of events without letting himself come through. A major part of coming-of-age is being able to stand on your own two feet and not be so swayed by the people around you. Unfortunately I haven't been getting much of that from Benji.

Another instance in which we witness Benji's lack of authority is when he can't be assertive about wearing goggles when playing with BB guns, or his discomfort with BB guns in general. He still feels pressured to go along with what everyone else is doing, and just as fate's cruel humor would have it, this lands Benji with a copper bullet lodged in his skull. This brings me back to Jason's conclusion at the end of Black Swan Green that "not giving a toss" is the whole trick to being confident. Benji clearly still buys way too much into what other people are thinking.

In the development of things with Melanie, I couldn't help but cringe when I saw the awkward way in which Benji brought her the ice cream and was instantly dismissed as she turned her attention toward Nick. He showed none of the suave poise he'd been seeking to achieve that would have aided him in handling the situation gracefully. Instead, he came off as more childish than ever, keeping his mouth shut and never confronting Melanie.

Although all this is very disappointing, I can only hope that these experiences will at the very least make him older and wiser, giving him lessons to grow from. Sometimes handling a situation badly molds the strength it takes to be prepared to handle a situation well in the future. With one chapter to go, I'm holding onto every last shred of optimism that something will finally click and give Benji a little more backbone.